Monday, March 3, 2014

End of a Marriage

Meera announced to me on Saturday, March 1st, that the first documents for initiating her divorce from me are ready and she needs me to go up to Union City to sign them.

It breaks my heart. I love her as much as I did when I fell in love with her more than 17 years ago. I love our family and it breaks my heart to see it torn apart this way.

It has been a grueling 16 months. I feel I did all I could to reconcile with her and repair our marriage, but, from what I can tell, her resolve to end it was sure and unwavering from the day she asked for a separation in October 2012.

Meera is moving on with her life, but will continue to share the parenting responsibilities with me. I will continue to do what I can to support her and encourage her when that is welcomed by her and appropriate. I also resolve to give her the space and distance, and try not to impinge on her peace of mind, her freedom to live her life, and fulfill herself according to her needs and desires.

I will continue to keep the lines of communication open to the best of my ability, and strive to understand her needs and feelings when she expresses them, and refrain from imposing my emotional burdens on her.

I will continue to love her, and wish her well. I will strive not to encroach on her life and pursuit of happiness when I'm battling with my own demons.

I will continue to honor, and love, and respect, and admire her. Meeting her, the good years we shared together, the creation and nurturing of our beautiful children, have been the most fulfilling and wonderful experiences of my life, and I will always cherish the blessings Meera's brilliant and generous soul have brought me.


Bill Cameron said...

I salute you for being a devout husband. You didn’t give up on trying to work things out in your relationship as a couple. However, we just can’t pursue something forever. It's great that you respect her need for space, yet you are still open to conversations and are still there for her and the children if need be. It doesn’t mean that you’ve totally given up, and it's an action that says that you still care. Just be strong for your children and make them your inspiration to move on.

Bill Cameron

Puzzled said...

Thank you, Bill, for your thoughtful and supportive comments. I agree with every word of your post; I strive to follow those values and keep that attitude moving forward. Emotions and sentimentality can be unpredictable and make me lose my focus, but it gets better; progress in the long run is continuous, despite the occasional setbacks. Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts. I am very grateful.